April 10, 2008
Dear Sadie,
I'm writing you this letter as you're sleeping in my belly as a 22 week fetus. Pregnancy has been quite the shocking experience. To be honest, I never pictured myself pregnant & you were somewhat unexpected. But, the love I already have for you is the most intense love I have ever felt. Your dad and I had a little video made of you when you were only an 18 week fetus. Everytime I watch you kicking the snot out of my uterus, I fall more in love with you. I can't wait to see you & find out if you're more like me (neurotic, spontaneous, disorganized, adventurous, emotional) or if you're like your daddy (stable, laid-back, hard-working, loves nature & animals, totally organized). I'm crossing my fingers for the latter. I assume parenting will be a lot easier if you are easy going. Either way, I know we're going to have so much fun.
I have to admit, I'm scared out of my mind to be your mommy. It only dawned on me not too long ago that I'm going to need to change DIAPERS! YIKES! I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing, so please be patient & forgiving with me.
I already want so much for you. I want to be the perfect parent--it's a long shot, but I can dream :-). The reason I'm writing you this letter is to share with you something that has come to mean a lot to me (not because it's 1:30am & I can't sleep).
You'll have a lot of experiences as you grow up. Some you'll succeed at, and some you won't. That's just life. I wish you could live your life and never have to experience failure, but so far I haven't been able figure out a way to avoid it. In order to really succeed in life, you have to learn how to fail--and once you've failed to KEEP TRYING. Don't be afraid to do anything because of the possibilty of failure. Everything I have done that has been worth it has been hard and I've wanted to quit many times. But, I can tell you that anything that's worth being proud of is going to be hard. Keep going and don't give up.
I hope you always have confidence in yourself. I hope you are always kind to others--like your dad, great-grandma Johnson, and Aunt Sally. Sometimes I lose my temper and hurt feelings. Try not to do it that way. I hope you work hard; it's the only way to get what you want. I hope you aren't afraid to experience life. Life is a kick in the pants, and you're going to love it.
I'm sure there is much more I'll want to say to you, but it's nearly 2am and I'm about to fall asleep with this pen up my nose.
Love,
Mama
Did I really tell my child that she was a mistake, and probably a failure, too? What just happened here.
9 comments:
Yes. Sadie's going to be soooooo pissed! Just kidding. I think she probably loves you.
WEll, she probably will be a loser and a failure at some point. It happens to the best of us. And by "us", I mean people who are not me.
She will love it no matter what you said to her. I thought it was simply lovely and quite frankly I didn't know you have it in you. ;)
Shes a lucky little girl.
I thought it was beautiful and knew exactly what you were getting at. I'm sure she will too. :)
sooo...is this also an announcement?
So cute!
Love, Love, Love. Tell Sadie that I hope she is an amazing big sister like you...That she always praises and adores her siblings, that she is loyal and loving and fun, that she dances in the car with them, that she takes care of them when they go to college and helps them to get to know their way around, that she puts money in their piggy bank just to make them happy...you don't have to tell her the part where it mysteriously disappears, through. I love you, deeds. Thanks for being part of my forever family.
This made me smile. I'm happy you have such a bond already and are able to talk to her about life. I hope that lasts forever! Congratulations. :)
very cute~
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